Friday, June 29, 2018
Monday, September 21, 2015
If something is important to us we find a way, if it's not we find an excuse.
Think about your own life.
Have there been times when you have gotten to a point where the "switch" was ON?
You had something you wanted so bad you could feel it?
It was almost like you had blinders on...you were going to get there and absolutely no one or anything was going to stop you from achieving this goal...you would move every mountain along the way.
Through time, hard work, focus and commitment YOU did it!
YOU made the goal!
YOU were successful!
Where was your head at the time...?
Where is your head now?
What lessons did you learn along the way?
Are you continuing to live those lessons?
Do you share those lessons with others?
Change takes commitment and focus and time.
I am issuing a challenge:
Write about YOUR journey and challenge.
Write about that one time in your life when you felt the tide of change-that moment when you KNEW you had to move forward.
Think about and answer the above questions.
I will not share unless you give me permission. Your stories are private.
This is an exercise in reflection.
I am looking forward to hearing from you at runonheart@msn.com.
Thursday, March 19, 2015
"Diet" is not a verb
Just eating less chocolate cake is not a life plan.
Nutritional balance is the key....it's all about WHAT you are taking in, what kind of work you are doing, how much you are doing and what you are fueling yourself with.
Food is not the enemy.
Factors we consider when making choices:
Nutritional balance is the key....it's all about WHAT you are taking in, what kind of work you are doing, how much you are doing and what you are fueling yourself with.
Food is not the enemy.
Factors we consider when making choices:
Taste
Emotional Comfort
Budget
Personal Preference
Values
Availability
Why is it that health benefits are often at the bottom of that list?
What is a carb?
ENERGY- Useable power.
PROTEIN-,, FISH, POLTRY ETC...are amino acids. Key in supporting body's structure. it keeps the machinery running smoothly.
Fat is often viewed as negative. It supplies more than twice the calories of other nutrients.
Fat stores vitamins....comes from various sources.
Vitamins and minerals are micro nutrients. Involved in healing, provides structure to skeleton, provides support for immune system.
Water is essential. helps with body temp, lubricates joints, eliminates waste....water needs are individual!
Emotional Comfort
Budget
Personal Preference
Values
Availability
Why is it that health benefits are often at the bottom of that list?
What is a carb?
ENERGY- Useable power.
PROTEIN-,, FISH, POLTRY ETC...are amino acids. Key in supporting body's structure. it keeps the machinery running smoothly.
Fat is often viewed as negative. It supplies more than twice the calories of other nutrients.
Fat stores vitamins....comes from various sources.
Vitamins and minerals are micro nutrients. Involved in healing, provides structure to skeleton, provides support for immune system.
Water is essential. helps with body temp, lubricates joints, eliminates waste....water needs are individual!
Thursday, March 12, 2015
Fitness and Personal Empowerment
One of the first and foremost reasons my private clients my reach out to me is to loose weight.
Many of the people I find myself helping are in the middle of their lives. Lives in which they have many obligations both business and personal.
I also find myself working with teens through my marching band boot camps.
In many ways everyone is so similar.
They are each trying to figure IT out.
The other day I pondered this: Why is the IT missing? Why aren't we growing up knowing how to do this stuff??
It is really puzzling to me.
Think about it: I am teaching people what they need to know for their lives that which they should have been taught in childhood.
What would this world be like if, as children, we all grew up in health, physically active and making great food and lifestyle choices?
What a wonderful and empowered world we would have!
Think about it.......if we start with ourselves, re-train, re-grow....re-learn eating habits, what would that mean within each of our relationships, our families, our communities and our world?
It's HUGE!
And it starts with each of us! one step, one day, one meal, one decision, one ISSUE at a time.
It's a commitment to deal with our own "stuff."
It's a commitment to move forward.
It's a commitment to be living example.
Think about this: Are there any negatives to living a full life in a state of fitness and personal empowerment?
Hmm....
Many of the people I find myself helping are in the middle of their lives. Lives in which they have many obligations both business and personal.
I also find myself working with teens through my marching band boot camps.
In many ways everyone is so similar.
They are each trying to figure IT out.
The other day I pondered this: Why is the IT missing? Why aren't we growing up knowing how to do this stuff??
It is really puzzling to me.
Think about it: I am teaching people what they need to know for their lives that which they should have been taught in childhood.
What would this world be like if, as children, we all grew up in health, physically active and making great food and lifestyle choices?
What a wonderful and empowered world we would have!
Think about it.......if we start with ourselves, re-train, re-grow....re-learn eating habits, what would that mean within each of our relationships, our families, our communities and our world?
It's HUGE!
And it starts with each of us! one step, one day, one meal, one decision, one ISSUE at a time.
It's a commitment to deal with our own "stuff."
It's a commitment to move forward.
It's a commitment to be living example.
Think about this: Are there any negatives to living a full life in a state of fitness and personal empowerment?
Hmm....
Tuesday, February 17, 2015
Pondering Change
Good morning all.
Things have been very busy this winter and it's all good. People making positive changes and working hard towards life goals.
It is so very inspiring to be part of someone's journey of personal growth.
Here is my very short post from mapmyrun.com this morning:
One must have a strong resolve and tough mindset to winter over outside in the Midwest. part of being able to continue I have found is really coming to terms with "this is my life and this is what I do...". It does not matter where you live, being fit, and pursuing the art of fitness is a lifestyle. one must think of oneself as a piece of marble...unfinished, yet beautiful in its own way. Everyday we chisel, sculpt, sand and polish working to create something solid. along the way, every day working the project we grow and change from the inside out..we have to.
Think about this: Even as winter just drones impossibly on, every single day you work consistently toward your own new vision you are absolutely empowering yourself!
How incredibly awesome.
Monday, February 2, 2015
Are You Training For Your Life?
Yesterday, while out running during the snowfall I was thinking about just how wonderful (yes) it was to be able to actually log miles on unplowed roads for nearly 2 hours during a storm without killing myself
at my age. I'm sure you are all pleased to know I have lived yet another day to train and bust your butts about any number of things. :)
at my age. I'm sure you are all pleased to know I have lived yet another day to train and bust your butts about any number of things. :)
Part of my reflection and thus my words today are this:
Aren't we all in fact training for our lives???
Why are you training???
Why are you each changing your respective lifestyles? Your eating habits?
I would submit that when it comes down to it, it is not for vanity.
At some point, we all find ourselves reflecting. bWe all find ourselves wanting to create a better quality life GOING FORWARD.
At what point do you let go and just go forward?
In order to do this-here is a big naked reality:
You have to let go of the negative and the "stuff" that just is not working for you! If you do not-you will never, ever get there.
If you want it...but find you are running in the same reactive loop, ask yourself the following and journal about it:
Why do I keep acting/reacting the same exact way and expecting something different?
I would submit that most of us want to, in some way hang on to our crutches and safety nets and have the positive as well.
It doesn't work that way.
Envision yourself morphing INTO something else...something more beautiful, solid, colorful....your own unique vision! That is who you can BECOME!
At some point in order to morph you have to dive in and let go. Otherwise, what is there?????
Everyday does not have to be "Day 1" However, everyday is in-fact, A Gift. I can teach, I can lead you towards a better, healthier version of yourself....BUT, before anything..YOU have to want to do the work to get there inside your brain and you have to be WILLING to let go.
Get to it everyone! Enjoy the gift of your day!
Wednesday, January 28, 2015
Why Diets Do Not Work
Simply put-because of the noise in our brains.
Studies have shown that there are at least 5 different brain patterns associated with overeating. So, if that is the case everyone's results will vary on the same diet.
This is why, by the way, I have always said DIETS DO NOT WORK lifestyle eating does.....and it is also the WHY behind what makes the journey so difficult for some of us.
It would seem to make sense to match eating strategies with the type of brain patterns that affects us each the most.
Here is a thought----What if you change your mind wouldn't your body follow???
There are five types of overeaters very simply and briefly stated:
1- Compulsive overeater-over focused on food. Uses food as a salve for hurt.
2-Impulsive overeater-someone who may be bored or easily distracted
3-Impulsive-compulsive overeater-Combination of 1 and 2
4-Sad or emotional eater-depressed, winter blues, carb cravings, sleeps a lot, low energy
5- Anxious overeater-tense, nervous, predicts the worst, eats to calm down
Listed below are nine helpful strategies:
1-Keep your blood sugar balanced
I have spoken a great deal over time about blood sugar levels and what happens when we eat simple sugars and refined carbs. Eliminating this goes along way to stabilizing our levels.
2-Decrease your use of artificial sweeteners.
The problem here is that they tend to be many times sweeter than sugar and can active the apetite center of your brain.
3- Manage stress
Need I tell you the affect of stress on our health? Managing it, means taking care of yourself. Working ACTIVELY to reduce your stress through exercise, meditation, journaling counseling...oh, and my favorite-setting limits on what we each ALLOW to affect us.
4-What out for and plan for the triggers
That would be outings, family events, holiday gathering, corporate functions-PLAN AHEAD. What does that look like? When eating at a restaurant make a plan. Go online before hand and look at the menu and commit to making good decisions. Family gatherings-bring something healthy. Corporate functions-many times you can order ahead. Do not be afraid to ask, for example, that the mashed potatoes be left off the plate in favor of adding extra veggies.
5-Food allergies
Some food allergies can reduce blood flow to the brain and impair judgement. What to look for: brain fog, moodiness, nasal congestion, headaches, sleep problems, joint and muscle aches, pain, fatigue, skin changes and GI issues.
6-Retrain your brain
Here it is: Make a habit of saying NO to the things that you KNOW are not good for you. At some point it will become the new normal. If you think about it, WHY would you routinely say YES to that which is not good for you??? Think about that.
7-Get moving with exercise.
A body in motion tends t stay in motion. This is good for blood supply to the brain and and your sense of wellness. Our bodies evolved as organisms meant to physically work and move.
8- SLEEP
Yes, getting enough sleep is a disciple.
Do it. WHY? Not just because I said so....here it is, the less sleep you get the more body fat you store and it tends to be belly fat. When we are over tired, we crave simple carbs....when we eat those simple carbs where do you think those calories get stored....YUP on your middle.
9-Take a natural vitamin supplement everyday for good measure.
It cannot hurt, and only help.
You may surmise from this that there is no quick fix. What it is about is the DAILY, ACTIVE work we do to change how we are wired. If this does not happen you really are destined to gain and lose FOREVER. Is this what you want the rest of your life to be?
Thursday, January 22, 2015
Life Skills and the Functionally Integrated Life
It is wonderful to make goals.
It's HOW YOU make them that counts.....
I can make plans and goals for you forever . However; the goals best made come from you and are specific. Even more specific than "I am going to loose 30 pounds."
Think about that....How general is that statement?
The minute something comes up...and life gets a bit tangled do you get stalled???
Let's evaluate what is and is not working and then come up with strategies that will work.
What is realistic and achievable in one week goals????
Homework time: On a sheet of paper write out the big goal. Then break it down by month and week. Within that week write out specifically how you plan to do it day by day. Then take it one step further: look at your potential barriers. Write them down.....then make a plan for how to deal with them. Helpful hint: Talk with me, we'll problem solve together if you get stuck.
Get it? We are breaking down seemingly insurmountable goals into smaller daily goals that are attainable and creating effective problem solving strategies within the plan.
“Goal setting has the potential to be an important facilitator of behavior change. Setting specific goals provides a potential strategy for organizing nutrition and physical activity information and skills into practical and manageable steps” (Shilts, Horowitz & Townsend, 2002).
Here is a good visual framework:
With diligence and practice you CAN begin to develop your skills in goal setting and problem solving which WILL lead to improved levels of fitness and the improved ability to be more self-reliant.
Thought: what if, as you begin to put the above steps into place you were to focus on adherence to actions/lifestyle that lead to your success rather that what the scale is saying while you develop your skill base? Would you feel more successful and accomplished?
Create your lists/plan. You can send it to me if you want or hold it and we'll talk about it when we meet.
Isn't it time in your life to FINALLY develop that skill set which will lead you towards that permanently healthier version of yourself?
Questions:
Do you tend to start and stop exercise routines?
Do you struggle to maintain a healthy lifestyle?
If you have answered "YES" then coaching is in order.
It is wonderful to make goals.
It's HOW YOU make them that counts.....
I can make plans and goals for you forever . However; the goals best made come from you and are specific. Even more specific than "I am going to loose 30 pounds."
Think about that....How general is that statement?
The minute something comes up...and life gets a bit tangled do you get stalled???
Evaluate what is and is not working and then come up with strategies that will work.
What is realistic and achievable in one week goals????
Homework time: On a sheet of paper write out the big goal. Then break it down by month and week. Within that week write out specifically how you plan to do it day by day. Then take it one step further: look at your potential barriers. Write them down.....then make a plan for how to deal with them.
Get it? We are breaking down seemingly insurmountable goals into smaller daily goals that are attainable and creating effective problem solving strategies within the plan.
Tuesday, January 13, 2015
Moving Forward
That's life, isn't it?
That is really how it works. Everyday we get up knowing that we need to move on...go forward....we resolve to do it right this time.
For about a day, a few days....until you see that irresistible thing at the store or on the counter...or you've had a tough day or stuff is just falling out of the sky around you and all of a sudden the really good and positive steps you are taking feel like they are embedded in cement.
So what do you do??? You sit. Stagnant. While life moves forward.
Here is what I know about life and choices:
We each choose how we deal with the stuff of our lives. None of us are victims to it. We cannot really control the outside stuff-what people say or how they think. But we do have FULL control of how we choose to react.
We are all wired differently, that is true. We each react differently to stress, sadness, happiness, and both good and bad fortune, that is also true.
We are also accountable to ourselves.
The quality of your life is a direct result of what you put into it and what you want out of it.
Is it enough to spend our lives 100% of our precious finite time serving the needs of others?
Is it enough to spend 100% of our precious finite time feeling bad about taking time for ourselves?
In this new year, what do each of you really want? Immediately? 6 months from now? 1 year from now? 5 years from now?? More Food for thought:
1- Do you have an all or nothing mind-set?
In the new year...what about an 80/20 rule CONSISTASNTLY?
2-Do you have the "I'm on a diet" mind-set?
In the new year let's shift the mind-set to lifestyle eating and problem solving eating weaknesses incrementally
3-Do you fear "public failure?"
I would submit those around you are cheering observers who, in reality, have their own struggles. They are just like you. They admire you for your everyday struggle.
4- Essential: Fitness needs to be FUN.
Yes, you have to put in the work to be fit enough to do the fun stuff....but really, while doing that prep work it helps to work in your life to find activities you actually like to do. Example: you like to swim....so do the work in the gym to make you strong enough to swim well. Get it?
5- Embrace new and interesting technology to aid in elevated fitness levels.
It's fun and motivating!!!!
6-Make a plan for change AND BE SPECIFIC!
I want to loose weight an get in shape is waaaaay to general.
First, ask yourself WHY because then we can break it down enough to create specific goals and concrete reasons. This is where sitting down and talking is a good tool. Reflective feedback can be very valuable information.
7- Pay attention to your little victories.
Way too often we set HUGE goals....which is in itself OK...however in setting these big goals we forget that along the way all the little accomplishments that happen as a result of setting this big goal are really important and significant too!
Love yourself! Allow yourself to enjoy the sense of satisfaction and pride of accomplishment that comes from moving forward in your life!
That is really how it works. Everyday we get up knowing that we need to move on...go forward....we resolve to do it right this time.
For about a day, a few days....until you see that irresistible thing at the store or on the counter...or you've had a tough day or stuff is just falling out of the sky around you and all of a sudden the really good and positive steps you are taking feel like they are embedded in cement.
So what do you do??? You sit. Stagnant. While life moves forward.
Here is what I know about life and choices:
We each choose how we deal with the stuff of our lives. None of us are victims to it. We cannot really control the outside stuff-what people say or how they think. But we do have FULL control of how we choose to react.
We are all wired differently, that is true. We each react differently to stress, sadness, happiness, and both good and bad fortune, that is also true.
We are also accountable to ourselves.
The quality of your life is a direct result of what you put into it and what you want out of it.
Is it enough to spend our lives 100% of our precious finite time serving the needs of others?
Is it enough to spend 100% of our precious finite time feeling bad about taking time for ourselves?
In this new year, what do each of you really want? Immediately? 6 months from now? 1 year from now? 5 years from now?? More Food for thought:
1- Do you have an all or nothing mind-set?
In the new year...what about an 80/20 rule CONSISTASNTLY?
2-Do you have the "I'm on a diet" mind-set?
In the new year let's shift the mind-set to lifestyle eating and problem solving eating weaknesses incrementally
3-Do you fear "public failure?"
I would submit those around you are cheering observers who, in reality, have their own struggles. They are just like you. They admire you for your everyday struggle.
4- Essential: Fitness needs to be FUN.
Yes, you have to put in the work to be fit enough to do the fun stuff....but really, while doing that prep work it helps to work in your life to find activities you actually like to do. Example: you like to swim....so do the work in the gym to make you strong enough to swim well. Get it?
5- Embrace new and interesting technology to aid in elevated fitness levels.
It's fun and motivating!!!!
6-Make a plan for change AND BE SPECIFIC!
I want to loose weight an get in shape is waaaaay to general.
First, ask yourself WHY because then we can break it down enough to create specific goals and concrete reasons. This is where sitting down and talking is a good tool. Reflective feedback can be very valuable information.
7- Pay attention to your little victories.
Way too often we set HUGE goals....which is in itself OK...however in setting these big goals we forget that along the way all the little accomplishments that happen as a result of setting this big goal are really important and significant too!
Love yourself! Allow yourself to enjoy the sense of satisfaction and pride of accomplishment that comes from moving forward in your life!
Friday, October 10, 2014
Thoughts on Exercise and Happiness
Quote from an article in IDEA Fitness Journal. The article is "The Skinny on Happiness."
"Exercise is one of the most effective tools we can use to elevate our level of happiness. But when we focus on loosing weight, or moving because we think we have to, we can turn one of nature's best medicines into a bad-tasting pill.
More and more research is proving the mental health benefits of exercise.... One of the best known studies-the SMILE Study (Standard Medical Intervention and Long-Term Exercise), conducted at Duke University (Blumethal et al. 2007)- showed that exercising times a week for 30 minutes each time was as helpful as taking an antidepressant for patients diagnosed with major depressive disorder. What's more, those on the drug were 4 times more likely to relapse into depression once the intervention ended compared with those who exercised.
Exercising, however, is not like taking and anti depressant. In fact, according to Tal Ben-Sharar, PHD, author of several books on happiness, including "Even Happier: A Gratitude Journal for Daily Joy and Lasting Fulfillment (McGraw Hill) it's the other way around: in essence , not exercising is like taking a depressant. We have the need for exercise, and when this need is not fulfilled, we pay a price. We were not made to be inactive, sitting in front of a computer screen all day, or spending our days in meetings. We were made to run after an antelope for lunch, or run away from a lion so that we don't become lunch. We frustrate a physical need when we don't exercise, and when we frustrate a need-whether of vitamins, proteins or exercise-we pay a price."
Exercising, however, is not like taking and anti depressant. In fact, according to Tal Ben-Sharar, PHD, author of several books on happiness, including "Even Happier: A Gratitude Journal for Daily Joy and Lasting Fulfillment (McGraw Hill) it's the other way around: in essence , not exercising is like taking a depressant. We have the need for exercise, and when this need is not fulfilled, we pay a price. We were not made to be inactive, sitting in front of a computer screen all day, or spending our days in meetings. We were made to run after an antelope for lunch, or run away from a lion so that we don't become lunch. We frustrate a physical need when we don't exercise, and when we frustrate a need-whether of vitamins, proteins or exercise-we pay a price."
Tuesday, September 2, 2014
"Oh, the Places You'll Go"- Thank you Dr Seuss
Who remembers the Dr. Seuss book "Oh, the Places You'll Go"?
Well, when my kids were little I wanted them to become familiar with life as a journey.
Sometimes it's amazing, interesting and exciting. You know exactly where you are going and what to do
" You'll pass the whole gang and you'll soon take the lead. Wherever you fly, you'll be the best of the best. Wherever you go, you will top ...all the rest."
Other times the journey can be more challenging with "bang ups and Hang ups."
The amazing thing is this: We DO eventually figure it out.
This lovely book goes on to say: "Somehow you'll escape all that waiting and staying. You'll find the bright places where the boom bands are playing"......"Ready for anything under the sky. Ready because you're that kind of guy!"
And then it happens again....the dark, hard and trying places. "But on you WILL go....though your arms may get sore and your sneakers may leak."
Will you succeed??????
"YES! You will, indeed!
(98 and 3/4 percent guaranteed.)
KID, YOU'LL MOVE MOUNTAINS!"
Never give up working to be the BEST version of yourself you can be.
Where are you on your journey??
Are you settling or are you striving?
How do you know what you are truly capable of?????
Think about it.
Well, when my kids were little I wanted them to become familiar with life as a journey.
Sometimes it's amazing, interesting and exciting. You know exactly where you are going and what to do
" You'll pass the whole gang and you'll soon take the lead. Wherever you fly, you'll be the best of the best. Wherever you go, you will top ...all the rest."
Other times the journey can be more challenging with "bang ups and Hang ups."
The amazing thing is this: We DO eventually figure it out.
This lovely book goes on to say: "Somehow you'll escape all that waiting and staying. You'll find the bright places where the boom bands are playing"......"Ready for anything under the sky. Ready because you're that kind of guy!"
And then it happens again....the dark, hard and trying places. "But on you WILL go....though your arms may get sore and your sneakers may leak."
Will you succeed??????
"YES! You will, indeed!
(98 and 3/4 percent guaranteed.)
KID, YOU'LL MOVE MOUNTAINS!"
Never give up working to be the BEST version of yourself you can be.
Where are you on your journey??
Are you settling or are you striving?
How do you know what you are truly capable of?????
Think about it.
Monday, June 9, 2014
Verb: Multi - Devotional
Muti-Devotional....
Definition:
Verb-action word....when one picks up the ball from one part of their life they do well and carries it over to the other part of their life to aid and assist in the effort of devotion to overall healthy life choices.
OR:
It's not all that difficult one just must be AWARE and INVOLVED in ones life.
How many of us just shuffle through and make choices because they are easy??
Now make choices because the are the RIGHT choice.
Tuesday, May 20, 2014
Emotional Eating
What is your relationship with food?
Do you have one?
Do you use it as a tool to deal with stress or other emotional pain?
Geneen Roth, an author and speaker that greatly admire has written a book:
Women God and Food: An Unexpected Path to Almost Everything could be worth a read.
A quote:
"The way you eat is inseparable from your core beliefs about being alive. No matter how sophisticated or wise or enlightened you believe you are, how you eat tells all. The world is on your plate. When you begin to understand what prompts you to use food as a way to numb or distract yourself, the process takes you deeper into realms of spirit and to the bright center of your own life. Rather than getting rid of or instantly changing your conflicted relationship with food, Women Food and God is about welcoming what is already here, and contacting the part of yourself that is already whole — divinity itself."
“we don’t want to eat hot fudge sundaes as much as we want our lives to be hot fudge sundaes.”
How many of us can relate to this?
What I know from life and having spent many years now working with people is that so many of us tie our emotions to food. In order to bring your self to a place where all the elements are centered and balanced this relationship needs to be dealt with.
Do you have one?
Do you use it as a tool to deal with stress or other emotional pain?
Geneen Roth, an author and speaker that greatly admire has written a book:
Women God and Food: An Unexpected Path to Almost Everything could be worth a read.
A quote:
"The way you eat is inseparable from your core beliefs about being alive. No matter how sophisticated or wise or enlightened you believe you are, how you eat tells all. The world is on your plate. When you begin to understand what prompts you to use food as a way to numb or distract yourself, the process takes you deeper into realms of spirit and to the bright center of your own life. Rather than getting rid of or instantly changing your conflicted relationship with food, Women Food and God is about welcoming what is already here, and contacting the part of yourself that is already whole — divinity itself."
“we don’t want to eat hot fudge sundaes as much as we want our lives to be hot fudge sundaes.”
How many of us can relate to this?
What I know from life and having spent many years now working with people is that so many of us tie our emotions to food. In order to bring your self to a place where all the elements are centered and balanced this relationship needs to be dealt with.
Wednesday, May 14, 2014
Resolving to move forward
Reflection:
We all hurt or have been hurt....no path is perfect and we all know that. I really believe to a great extent that we each CHOOSE how we get through life. At the end of my time here I want to be able to sit somewhere tropical (yes, where I will live) with a fabulous glass of wine in one hand and my loved ones around me reveling in what a great ride it was...that I lived wholly, that I made a difference, that people are better for having known me.
The world will go on but I just want to know I have made a positive ripple.:)
Heal a hurt today...move forward today...do not repeat mistakes today....learn to sincerely love and be loved today.
Second Reflection:
Life only goes in one direction-forward.
If we hold on to hurt and pain how does that mesh?
It doesn't.
It sets you on the sidelines and then you just wait your whole life to LIVE.
It is OK to mull over hurts when they happen-and we should so that we learn.
However, if life is what we each make it then what kind of life are we each making for ourselves if we do not CHOOSE to heal and move forward?
We all hurt or have been hurt....no path is perfect and we all know that. I really believe to a great extent that we each CHOOSE how we get through life. At the end of my time here I want to be able to sit somewhere tropical (yes, where I will live) with a fabulous glass of wine in one hand and my loved ones around me reveling in what a great ride it was...that I lived wholly, that I made a difference, that people are better for having known me.
The world will go on but I just want to know I have made a positive ripple.:)
Heal a hurt today...move forward today...do not repeat mistakes today....learn to sincerely love and be loved today.
Second Reflection:
Life only goes in one direction-forward.
If we hold on to hurt and pain how does that mesh?
It doesn't.
It sets you on the sidelines and then you just wait your whole life to LIVE.
It is OK to mull over hurts when they happen-and we should so that we learn.
However, if life is what we each make it then what kind of life are we each making for ourselves if we do not CHOOSE to heal and move forward?
Tuesday, April 22, 2014
Looking toward your own horizon
Horizon...
Definition: The line at which the sky and earth appear to meet.
So what does it mean when we say...Look toward the horizon..????
More succinctly...what does it mean to you?
Blogging, like life, is a marathon...or an Ultra-but certainly not a 5k.
Yesterday, like many people, I spent a good portion of the day watching the 118th Boston Marathon. It holds a special place in my heart, not just because I am a runner; but because I grew up out there. In general it was such a healing and joyous day; what a wonderful show of unity. I even looked up my qualifying time again all the while wondering if, in fact, I still had it in me to work to qualify. Years ago, I made a choice to help pace others through to their goals in Chicago. It was a worthwhile pursuit. In this moment I am still pondering.
Over the years life moves on as it does, relentlessly forward. Kids have grown, we have moved north....as far north as I will ever go having discovered in my middle age just how much I dislike winter. My perfect life is summers north and winters far south. The thought of never really having to wear a ski mask and 5 layers to run ever again is very attractive to me; especially after our 100 year winter.
So, as I sit here and type this out...I am thinking: "9:54:00 per mile...at 26 miles, Hmm...maybe." Or maybe just train and run..and more running...
Like everyone else I am caught up in kids, job, home...and all the amazing joy and trial that life brings. One thing I have learned is this: every day is new. It's a chance to start again. It's a chance to do life better-every time the sun rises. Life is the coolest marathon I know.
Over the years life moves on as it does, relentlessly forward. Kids have grown, we have moved north....as far north as I will ever go having discovered in my middle age just how much I dislike winter. My perfect life is summers north and winters far south. The thought of never really having to wear a ski mask and 5 layers to run ever again is very attractive to me; especially after our 100 year winter.
So, as I sit here and type this out...I am thinking: "9:54:00 per mile...at 26 miles, Hmm...maybe." Or maybe just train and run..and more running...
Like everyone else I am caught up in kids, job, home...and all the amazing joy and trial that life brings. One thing I have learned is this: every day is new. It's a chance to start again. It's a chance to do life better-every time the sun rises. Life is the coolest marathon I know.
Thursday, December 9, 2010
Life...
It's been a long while since I've journaled I started this thing for Ty and Madie as a way for them to not only understand me when the time came...but to maybe help them understand themselves a little better. I have not felt the need to write for a while because life was fairly predicable and I felt like the girls had a handle on it themselves....
Now, well...I think it's time to write again.
Madison my dear....at 13 what can I say?? You go girl. You are smart and funny and don't appear to give a damn about what other people think. you love science and animals. More importantly you admit to loving science in front of Tyler...even when she makes you feel like it's not a good thing. You each have to be yourselves...
This is the first week of Gizmo....and just watching you I know it was a good choice to consent to getting a chin. You have endless compassion. Last night we cried for Lori because we were sad that she had to give him up after 10 years...I am still sad for her. We just have to take extra special care of Gizmo and send her plenty of pics. He could, after all live another 15 years.....
Tyler...now you are 15 and very shortly 16. Ours is a complicated relationship...deep down though, it's good.
You are extremely smart, intuitive and sensitive with a deep love and belief/faith in god. You are also very afraid of a lot....and are unsure of your abilities and don't understand yet your own level of intelligence. Do not make the mistake of defining you self-worth based on what boys say about you. It comes from within.
Enough for now....now I am ready to write again.
Now, well...I think it's time to write again.
Madison my dear....at 13 what can I say?? You go girl. You are smart and funny and don't appear to give a damn about what other people think. you love science and animals. More importantly you admit to loving science in front of Tyler...even when she makes you feel like it's not a good thing. You each have to be yourselves...
This is the first week of Gizmo....and just watching you I know it was a good choice to consent to getting a chin. You have endless compassion. Last night we cried for Lori because we were sad that she had to give him up after 10 years...I am still sad for her. We just have to take extra special care of Gizmo and send her plenty of pics. He could, after all live another 15 years.....
Tyler...now you are 15 and very shortly 16. Ours is a complicated relationship...deep down though, it's good.
You are extremely smart, intuitive and sensitive with a deep love and belief/faith in god. You are also very afraid of a lot....and are unsure of your abilities and don't understand yet your own level of intelligence. Do not make the mistake of defining you self-worth based on what boys say about you. It comes from within.
Enough for now....now I am ready to write again.
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
Defining Priorities
Do you ever look at your life and wonder just where all the STUFF came from?
All the meaningless busyness and obligation?
All the distraction?
We gather clutter.
To what end???
It seems to me that what really counts in life is what we are each left with when you strip away EVERYTHING ..houses, cars...Yes, KIDS..(they grow up and move out-though they are an important priority when they are growing up.)....family , friends...toys...everything...
Picture yourself standing naked and alone facing the person you consider your significant other..
Who is this person you are left standing next to-do you KNOW them?
Can you laugh together?
Are you each sensitive to the others tears of joy and sorrow?
Can you REALLY communicate with this person?
Can you learn from each other?
Do you respect each other?
Is this person your BEST friend?
What do you have in common?
Do you have implicit trust in one another?
When you have sex, or make love can you loose yourself in that person?
It seems to me that THESE are the important questions..It IS what matters.
How many of us can say that in our lives we have tended to our relationships in such a way that we can answer each of the questions above in a positive way???
All the meaningless busyness and obligation?
All the distraction?
We gather clutter.
To what end???
It seems to me that what really counts in life is what we are each left with when you strip away EVERYTHING ..houses, cars...Yes, KIDS..(they grow up and move out-though they are an important priority when they are growing up.)....family , friends...toys...everything...
Picture yourself standing naked and alone facing the person you consider your significant other..
Who is this person you are left standing next to-do you KNOW them?
Can you laugh together?
Are you each sensitive to the others tears of joy and sorrow?
Can you REALLY communicate with this person?
Can you learn from each other?
Do you respect each other?
Is this person your BEST friend?
What do you have in common?
Do you have implicit trust in one another?
When you have sex, or make love can you loose yourself in that person?
It seems to me that THESE are the important questions..It IS what matters.
How many of us can say that in our lives we have tended to our relationships in such a way that we can answer each of the questions above in a positive way???
Thursday, January 29, 2009
More words to live by
The making of a champion
Excerpts from the inspirational book by Mike Murdock
Rejection is not fatal. It is merely someone's opinion.
Great People simply have great habits.
You are the solution to somebody with a problem.
None of us are born great. You became what you are. You discovered what you know.
People do not really decide their future...they decide their habits...then, their habits decide their future.
Every champion must be willing to believe in his own dream when others seem too busy or uncaring to encourage him.
Stop asking yourself questions that do not have answers.
Ask yourself creative questions such as HOW can I improve the situation?
Take time to do things right.
Never complain about what you permit.
You will never be promoted until you become over-qualified for your present position.
Happiness begins between your ears.
The quality of your preparation determines the quality of your performance.
The victory will go to the one who never quits.
A successful life is often expensive.
It will cost you something to become a champion-Time- Energy- Focus!
The secret of your future is hidden in your daily routine.
Winning doesn't start around you...it begins INSIDE you.
Sunday, December 21, 2008
Sustainable Happiness
This is a rather long post. It is an article...It perfectly explains the principles upon which I base my life.
What is happiness, and how can we achieve it?
Happiness can’t be reduced to a few agreeable sensations. Rather, it is a way of being and of experiencing the world -- a profound fulfillment that suffuses every moment and endures despite inevitable setbacks.
The paths we take in search of happiness often lead us to frustration and suffering instead. We try to create outer conditions that we believe will make us happy. But it is the mind itself that translates outer conditions into happiness or suffering. This is why we can be deeply unhappy even though we “have it all” -- wealth, power, health, a good family, etc. -- and, conversely, we can remain strong and serene in the face of hardship.
Authentic happiness is a way of being and a skill to be cultivated. When we first begin, the mind is vulnerable and untamed, like that of a monkey or a restless child. It takes practice to gain inner peace, inner strength, altruistic love, forbearance, and other qualities that lead to authentic happiness.
His Holiness the Dalai Lama often teaches that, while there are limitations to how much information one can learn and to our physical performance, compassion can be developed boundlessly.
Practicing Happiness
It is not difficult to begin. You just have to sit from time to time, turn your mind within, and let your thoughts calm down. Focus your attention on a chosen object. It can be an object in your room, your breath, or your own mind. Inevitably, your mind will wander as you do this. Each time it does, gently bring it back to the object of concentration, like a butterfly that returns again and again to a flower.
In the freshness of the present moment, past is gone, future is not yet born, and -- if one remains in pure mindfulness and freedom -- disturbing thoughts arise and go without leaving a trace. That is basic meditation.
Pure consciousness without content is something all those who meditate regularly and seriously have experienced -- it is not just some sort of Buddhist theory. And anyone who takes the trouble to stabilize and clarify his or her mind will be able to experience it, too. It is through this unconditioned aspect of consciousness that we can transform the content of mind through training.
But meditation also means to cultivate basic human qualities, such as attention and compassion, and new ways of experiencing the world. What really matters is that a person gradually changes. Over months and years, we become less impatient, less prone to anger, less torn between hopes and fears. It becomes inconceivable to willingly harm another person. We develop a propensity toward altruistic behavior and the cluster of qualities that give us the resources to deal with the ups and downs of life.
The point here is that you can look at your thoughts, including strong emotions, with a pure mindfulness that is not associated with the contents of the thoughts.
Take the example of malevolent anger. We usually identify with anger. Anger can fill our mental landscape and project its distorted reality on people and events. When we are overwhelmed by anger, we cannot dissociate from it. We perpetuate a vicious circle of affliction by rekindling anger each time we see or remember the person who makes us angry. We become addicted to the cause of suffering.
But if we dissociate from anger and look at it with mindfulness, that which is aware of anger is not angry, and we can see that anger is just a bunch of thoughts. Anger doesn’t cut like a knife, burn like a fire, or crush like a rock; it is nothing more than a product of our mind. Instead of “being” the anger, we understand that we are not the anger, in the same way that clouds are not the sky.
So, to deal with anger, we avoid letting our mind jump again and again to the trigger for our anger. Then we look at anger itself and keep our attention upon it. If we stop adding wood to a fire and just watch, the fire will die out. Likewise, anger will vanish away, without being forcibly repressed or allowed to explode.
There is no question of not experiencing emotions; it’s a question of not being enslaved by them. Let emotions arise, but let them be freed from their afflictive components: distortion of reality, mental confusion, clinging, and suffering for oneself and others.
There is great virtue in resting from time to time in pure awareness of the present moment, and being able to refer to this state when afflictive emotions arise so that we do not identify with them and are not swayed by them.
It is difficult in the beginning, but becomes quite natural as you become increasingly familiar with such an approach. Whenever anger arises, you learn to recognize it right away. If you know someone to be a pickpocket, even if he mingles in a crowd, you will spot him right away and keep a careful eye on him.
Interdependence
Just as you can learn to deal with afflictive thoughts, you can learn to cultivate and enhance wholesome ones. To be filled with love and kindness brings about an optimal way of being. It is a win-win situation: you will enjoy lasting well-being for yourself, you’ll act in altruistic ways towards others, and you’ll be perceived as a good human being.
If altruistic love is based on an understanding of the interdependence of all beings and of their natural aspiration to happiness, and if this love extends impartially to all beings, then it is a source of genuine happiness. Acts of overflowing love, of pure, disinterested generosity -- as when you make a child happy or help someone in need, even if nobody knows what you have done -- generate a deep and heartwarming fulfillment.
Human qualities often come in clusters. Altruism, inner peace, strength, freedom, and genuine happiness thrive together like the parts of a nourishing fruit. Likewise, selfishness, animosity, and fear grow together. So, while helping others may not always be “pleasant,” it leads the mind to a sense of inner peace, courage, and harmony with the interdependence of all things and beings.
Afflictive mental states, on the other hand, begin with self-centeredness, with an increase in the gap between self and others. These states are related to excessive self-importance and self-cherishing associated with fear or resentment towards others, and grasping for outer things as part of a hopeless pursuit of selfish happiness. A selfish pursuit of happiness is a lose-lose situation: you make yourself miserable and make others miserable as well.
Inner conflicts are often linked with excessive rumination on the past and anticipation of the future. You are not truly paying attention to the present moment, but are engrossed in your thoughts, going on and on in a vicious circle, feeding your ego and self-centeredness.
This is the opposite of bare attention. To turn your attention inside means to look at pure awareness itself and dwell without distraction, yet effortlessly, in the present moment.
If you cultivate these mental skills, after a while you won’t need to apply contrived efforts anymore. You can deal with mental perturbations like the eagles I see from the window of my hermitage in the Himalayas deal with crows. The crows often attack them, diving at the eagles from above. But, instead of doing all kinds of acrobatics, the eagle simply retracts one wing at the last moment, lets the diving crow pass, and then extends its wing again. The whole thing requires minimal effort and causes little disturbance.
Being experienced in dealing with the sudden arising of emotions in the mind works in a similar way.
I have been exposed to the world of humanitarian activities for a number of years since I decided to dedicate the entire royalties of my books to 30 projects on education and health in Tibet, Nepal, and India, with a group of dedicated volunteers and generous philanthropists. It is easy to see how corruption, clashes of ego, weak empathy, discouragement can plague the humanitarian world. All this stems from a lack of maturity. So the advantages of spending time to develop human altruism and compassionate courage are obvious.
The Fragrance of Peace
The most important time to meditate or do other types of spiritual practices is early in the morning. You set the tone for the day and the “fragrance” of the meditation will remain and give a particular perfume to the whole day. Another important time is before falling asleep. If you clearly generate a positive state of mind, filled with compassion or altruism, this will give a different quality to the whole night.
When people experience “moments of grace”, or “magical moments” in daily life, while walking in the snow under the stars or spending a beautiful moment with dear friends by the seaside, what is really happening? All of a sudden, they have left their burden of inner conflicts behind. They feel in harmony with others, with themselves, with the world. It is wonderful to fully enjoy such magical moments, but it is also revealing to understand why they feel so good: pacification of inner conflicts; a better sense of interdependence with everything rather than fragmenting reality; and a respite from the mental toxins of aggression and obsession. All these qualities can be cultivated through developing wisdom and inner freedom. This will lead not just to a few moments of grace but to a lasting state of well-being that we may call genuine happiness.
In this state, feelings of insecurity gradually give way to a deep confidence that you can deal with life’s ups and downs. Your equanimity will spare you from being swayed like mountain grass in the wind by every possible praise and blame, gain and loss, comfort and discomfort. You can always draw on deep inner peace, and the waves at the surface will not appear as threatening.
YES! MagazinePosted on December 19, 2008, Printed on December 21,
What is happiness, and how can we achieve it?
Happiness can’t be reduced to a few agreeable sensations. Rather, it is a way of being and of experiencing the world -- a profound fulfillment that suffuses every moment and endures despite inevitable setbacks.
The paths we take in search of happiness often lead us to frustration and suffering instead. We try to create outer conditions that we believe will make us happy. But it is the mind itself that translates outer conditions into happiness or suffering. This is why we can be deeply unhappy even though we “have it all” -- wealth, power, health, a good family, etc. -- and, conversely, we can remain strong and serene in the face of hardship.
Authentic happiness is a way of being and a skill to be cultivated. When we first begin, the mind is vulnerable and untamed, like that of a monkey or a restless child. It takes practice to gain inner peace, inner strength, altruistic love, forbearance, and other qualities that lead to authentic happiness.
His Holiness the Dalai Lama often teaches that, while there are limitations to how much information one can learn and to our physical performance, compassion can be developed boundlessly.
Practicing Happiness
It is not difficult to begin. You just have to sit from time to time, turn your mind within, and let your thoughts calm down. Focus your attention on a chosen object. It can be an object in your room, your breath, or your own mind. Inevitably, your mind will wander as you do this. Each time it does, gently bring it back to the object of concentration, like a butterfly that returns again and again to a flower.
In the freshness of the present moment, past is gone, future is not yet born, and -- if one remains in pure mindfulness and freedom -- disturbing thoughts arise and go without leaving a trace. That is basic meditation.
Pure consciousness without content is something all those who meditate regularly and seriously have experienced -- it is not just some sort of Buddhist theory. And anyone who takes the trouble to stabilize and clarify his or her mind will be able to experience it, too. It is through this unconditioned aspect of consciousness that we can transform the content of mind through training.
But meditation also means to cultivate basic human qualities, such as attention and compassion, and new ways of experiencing the world. What really matters is that a person gradually changes. Over months and years, we become less impatient, less prone to anger, less torn between hopes and fears. It becomes inconceivable to willingly harm another person. We develop a propensity toward altruistic behavior and the cluster of qualities that give us the resources to deal with the ups and downs of life.
The point here is that you can look at your thoughts, including strong emotions, with a pure mindfulness that is not associated with the contents of the thoughts.
Take the example of malevolent anger. We usually identify with anger. Anger can fill our mental landscape and project its distorted reality on people and events. When we are overwhelmed by anger, we cannot dissociate from it. We perpetuate a vicious circle of affliction by rekindling anger each time we see or remember the person who makes us angry. We become addicted to the cause of suffering.
But if we dissociate from anger and look at it with mindfulness, that which is aware of anger is not angry, and we can see that anger is just a bunch of thoughts. Anger doesn’t cut like a knife, burn like a fire, or crush like a rock; it is nothing more than a product of our mind. Instead of “being” the anger, we understand that we are not the anger, in the same way that clouds are not the sky.
So, to deal with anger, we avoid letting our mind jump again and again to the trigger for our anger. Then we look at anger itself and keep our attention upon it. If we stop adding wood to a fire and just watch, the fire will die out. Likewise, anger will vanish away, without being forcibly repressed or allowed to explode.
There is no question of not experiencing emotions; it’s a question of not being enslaved by them. Let emotions arise, but let them be freed from their afflictive components: distortion of reality, mental confusion, clinging, and suffering for oneself and others.
There is great virtue in resting from time to time in pure awareness of the present moment, and being able to refer to this state when afflictive emotions arise so that we do not identify with them and are not swayed by them.
It is difficult in the beginning, but becomes quite natural as you become increasingly familiar with such an approach. Whenever anger arises, you learn to recognize it right away. If you know someone to be a pickpocket, even if he mingles in a crowd, you will spot him right away and keep a careful eye on him.
Interdependence
Just as you can learn to deal with afflictive thoughts, you can learn to cultivate and enhance wholesome ones. To be filled with love and kindness brings about an optimal way of being. It is a win-win situation: you will enjoy lasting well-being for yourself, you’ll act in altruistic ways towards others, and you’ll be perceived as a good human being.
If altruistic love is based on an understanding of the interdependence of all beings and of their natural aspiration to happiness, and if this love extends impartially to all beings, then it is a source of genuine happiness. Acts of overflowing love, of pure, disinterested generosity -- as when you make a child happy or help someone in need, even if nobody knows what you have done -- generate a deep and heartwarming fulfillment.
Human qualities often come in clusters. Altruism, inner peace, strength, freedom, and genuine happiness thrive together like the parts of a nourishing fruit. Likewise, selfishness, animosity, and fear grow together. So, while helping others may not always be “pleasant,” it leads the mind to a sense of inner peace, courage, and harmony with the interdependence of all things and beings.
Afflictive mental states, on the other hand, begin with self-centeredness, with an increase in the gap between self and others. These states are related to excessive self-importance and self-cherishing associated with fear or resentment towards others, and grasping for outer things as part of a hopeless pursuit of selfish happiness. A selfish pursuit of happiness is a lose-lose situation: you make yourself miserable and make others miserable as well.
Inner conflicts are often linked with excessive rumination on the past and anticipation of the future. You are not truly paying attention to the present moment, but are engrossed in your thoughts, going on and on in a vicious circle, feeding your ego and self-centeredness.
This is the opposite of bare attention. To turn your attention inside means to look at pure awareness itself and dwell without distraction, yet effortlessly, in the present moment.
If you cultivate these mental skills, after a while you won’t need to apply contrived efforts anymore. You can deal with mental perturbations like the eagles I see from the window of my hermitage in the Himalayas deal with crows. The crows often attack them, diving at the eagles from above. But, instead of doing all kinds of acrobatics, the eagle simply retracts one wing at the last moment, lets the diving crow pass, and then extends its wing again. The whole thing requires minimal effort and causes little disturbance.
Being experienced in dealing with the sudden arising of emotions in the mind works in a similar way.
I have been exposed to the world of humanitarian activities for a number of years since I decided to dedicate the entire royalties of my books to 30 projects on education and health in Tibet, Nepal, and India, with a group of dedicated volunteers and generous philanthropists. It is easy to see how corruption, clashes of ego, weak empathy, discouragement can plague the humanitarian world. All this stems from a lack of maturity. So the advantages of spending time to develop human altruism and compassionate courage are obvious.
The Fragrance of Peace
The most important time to meditate or do other types of spiritual practices is early in the morning. You set the tone for the day and the “fragrance” of the meditation will remain and give a particular perfume to the whole day. Another important time is before falling asleep. If you clearly generate a positive state of mind, filled with compassion or altruism, this will give a different quality to the whole night.
When people experience “moments of grace”, or “magical moments” in daily life, while walking in the snow under the stars or spending a beautiful moment with dear friends by the seaside, what is really happening? All of a sudden, they have left their burden of inner conflicts behind. They feel in harmony with others, with themselves, with the world. It is wonderful to fully enjoy such magical moments, but it is also revealing to understand why they feel so good: pacification of inner conflicts; a better sense of interdependence with everything rather than fragmenting reality; and a respite from the mental toxins of aggression and obsession. All these qualities can be cultivated through developing wisdom and inner freedom. This will lead not just to a few moments of grace but to a lasting state of well-being that we may call genuine happiness.
In this state, feelings of insecurity gradually give way to a deep confidence that you can deal with life’s ups and downs. Your equanimity will spare you from being swayed like mountain grass in the wind by every possible praise and blame, gain and loss, comfort and discomfort. You can always draw on deep inner peace, and the waves at the surface will not appear as threatening.
YES! MagazinePosted on December 19, 2008, Printed on December 21,
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Simple Buddist Wisdom
This, I think is a lovely bit of wisdom:
Better than a thousand hollow words is one word that brings peace.
Better than a thousand hollow verses is one verse that brings peace.
It is better to conquer yourself than to win a thousand battles.
Then the victory is yours.
- Buddha in the Dhammapada
Better than a thousand hollow words is one word that brings peace.
Better than a thousand hollow verses is one verse that brings peace.
It is better to conquer yourself than to win a thousand battles.
Then the victory is yours.
- Buddha in the Dhammapada
Sunday, November 23, 2008
Thanksgiving 2008
This is my absolute favorite holiday of the year. It's all about food, family and love-showing it...living in it..being in it. Being ever so grateful for what life presents us with everyday..that helps us to grow and be better people which then helps us to create a better world.
As I reflect upon this last year since Thanksgiving '07...a couple of babies have been born...new cherished friends have been made...records have been set...my own children have sometimes not so gracefully...grown in their minds and their respective heights. :)
On a very personal note...I am really very happy with my life and the people on both a professional and very personal level I am blessed to have in it. My children keep me hopping...they make me laugh...and as well, through them I am continually challenged to be both a better mother and and a better woman on a daily basis.
So, as you look around your own tables live in the moment and be grateful and thankful for all of the good things in your life. Then look inward....reflect upon where you were a year ago...where you are now...and where you want to go....Then...make it happen.
As I reflect upon this last year since Thanksgiving '07...a couple of babies have been born...new cherished friends have been made...records have been set...my own children have sometimes not so gracefully...grown in their minds and their respective heights. :)
On a very personal note...I am really very happy with my life and the people on both a professional and very personal level I am blessed to have in it. My children keep me hopping...they make me laugh...and as well, through them I am continually challenged to be both a better mother and and a better woman on a daily basis.
So, as you look around your own tables live in the moment and be grateful and thankful for all of the good things in your life. Then look inward....reflect upon where you were a year ago...where you are now...and where you want to go....Then...make it happen.
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
Peace and Trust Within: The Cushion
Below are a couple of pieces I've borrowed...because I think they get right to the heart of what it is I want to say....
The first:
"There is a part of the sea known as “the cushion of the sea.” It lies beneath the surface that is agitated by storms and churned by the wind. It is so deep that it is a part of the sea that is never stirred.
When the ocean floor in these deep places is dredged of the remains of plant or animal life, it reveals evidence of having remained completely undisturbed for hundreds, if not thousands, of years. Unaffected by all the turbulence that was above it."
Here: In these times that we currently find ourselves living in , the world around us is in turmoil. There is not one person that has not been affected in some way on a very personal level. I had been having trouble trying to figure out just how to effectively communicate about it. Well, recently, I had a conversation with someone who used the above analogy.
It's a PERFECT analogy, and it was exactly the direction I was trying to go all the while.
To wit:
Where is your cushion?
How easy is it for us each to loose site of it?
If you stray from your cushion then did you ever really know what or where it was?
Think about it as a place of calm, peace and light and when you live in that no matter what is happening in your life your core cannot be shaken. Your decisions, reasoning...thinking all come from a place of light and love-proactively- not darkness and fear or reactively.
It is the base of everything that comes from each of us.
Next:
"Many of us seek the answers to life’s questions by looking outside of ourselves and trying to glean advice from the people around us. But as each of us is unique, with our own personal histories, our own sense of right and wrong, and our own way of experiencing the world that defines our realities, looking to others for our answers is only partially helpful. The answers to our personal questions can be most often found by looking within.
When you realize that you always have access to the part of you that always knows what you need and is meant to act as your inner compass, you can stop searching outside of yourself. If you can learn to hear, trust, and embrace the wisdom that lives within you, you will be able to confidently navigate your life.
Trusting your inner wisdom may be awkward at first, particularly if you grew up around people who taught you to look to others for answers. We each have exclusive access to our inner knowing. All we have to do is remember how to listen. Remember to be patient as you relearn how to hear, receive, and follow your own guidance.
If you are unsure about whether following your inner wisdom will prove reliable, you may want to think of a time when you did trust your own knowing and everything worked out. Recall how the answers came to you, how they felt in your body as you considered them, and what happened when you acted upon this guidance. Now, recall a time when you didn’t trust yourself and the results didn’t work out as you had hoped.
Trusting your own guidance can help you avoid going against what you instinctively know is right for you.When you second guess yourself and go against what you know to be your truth, you can easily go off course because you are no longer following your inner compass. By looking inside yourself for the answers to your life’s questions, you are consulting your best guide. Only you can know the how’s and why’s of your life. "
The answers that you seek can be found when you start answering your own questions.
The first:
"There is a part of the sea known as “the cushion of the sea.” It lies beneath the surface that is agitated by storms and churned by the wind. It is so deep that it is a part of the sea that is never stirred.
When the ocean floor in these deep places is dredged of the remains of plant or animal life, it reveals evidence of having remained completely undisturbed for hundreds, if not thousands, of years. Unaffected by all the turbulence that was above it."
Here: In these times that we currently find ourselves living in , the world around us is in turmoil. There is not one person that has not been affected in some way on a very personal level. I had been having trouble trying to figure out just how to effectively communicate about it. Well, recently, I had a conversation with someone who used the above analogy.
It's a PERFECT analogy, and it was exactly the direction I was trying to go all the while.
To wit:
Where is your cushion?
How easy is it for us each to loose site of it?
If you stray from your cushion then did you ever really know what or where it was?
Think about it as a place of calm, peace and light and when you live in that no matter what is happening in your life your core cannot be shaken. Your decisions, reasoning...thinking all come from a place of light and love-proactively- not darkness and fear or reactively.
It is the base of everything that comes from each of us.
Next:
"Many of us seek the answers to life’s questions by looking outside of ourselves and trying to glean advice from the people around us. But as each of us is unique, with our own personal histories, our own sense of right and wrong, and our own way of experiencing the world that defines our realities, looking to others for our answers is only partially helpful. The answers to our personal questions can be most often found by looking within.
When you realize that you always have access to the part of you that always knows what you need and is meant to act as your inner compass, you can stop searching outside of yourself. If you can learn to hear, trust, and embrace the wisdom that lives within you, you will be able to confidently navigate your life.
Trusting your inner wisdom may be awkward at first, particularly if you grew up around people who taught you to look to others for answers. We each have exclusive access to our inner knowing. All we have to do is remember how to listen. Remember to be patient as you relearn how to hear, receive, and follow your own guidance.
If you are unsure about whether following your inner wisdom will prove reliable, you may want to think of a time when you did trust your own knowing and everything worked out. Recall how the answers came to you, how they felt in your body as you considered them, and what happened when you acted upon this guidance. Now, recall a time when you didn’t trust yourself and the results didn’t work out as you had hoped.
Trusting your own guidance can help you avoid going against what you instinctively know is right for you.When you second guess yourself and go against what you know to be your truth, you can easily go off course because you are no longer following your inner compass. By looking inside yourself for the answers to your life’s questions, you are consulting your best guide. Only you can know the how’s and why’s of your life. "
The answers that you seek can be found when you start answering your own questions.
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
What if...
...you had but one day to live and you knew it.
What would you do with it?
What would become so very important to you?
Who would you visit?
What places would you want to go to just one last time?
What are the things you need to do?
What conversations need to happen?
What would you want a taste of???
What or who would you want to hear or feel...just one last time???
Who would you make amends with?
Isn't it true that our lives.....lived every single day are just like that?
There is no promise of tomorrow.
There really is not.
What becomes important to you in that moment when you know, for certain, that you have just one single day?
If you think about it, when we each wake up in the morning that is just what we have. The gift of the very day...the very moment.... the very second we are so blessed to live in.
So, what is all this other stuff that gets in the way?
What would you do with it?
What would become so very important to you?
Who would you visit?
What places would you want to go to just one last time?
What are the things you need to do?
What conversations need to happen?
What would you want a taste of???
What or who would you want to hear or feel...just one last time???
Who would you make amends with?
Isn't it true that our lives.....lived every single day are just like that?
There is no promise of tomorrow.
There really is not.
What becomes important to you in that moment when you know, for certain, that you have just one single day?
If you think about it, when we each wake up in the morning that is just what we have. The gift of the very day...the very moment.... the very second we are so blessed to live in.
So, what is all this other stuff that gets in the way?
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